Work work work

I have to send 2 shout-outs really quick:
1- Amanda... thank you for being my first follower. Pretty soon I'm going to have as many as Charles Manson and you can say you were the first. But no seriously Amanda, thank you. I love you to death.
2- Sterling... thank you for giving me this idea. Sterling is an amazing bloggess herself (check out her incredible blog.... STERLING'S BLOG Sterling is really probably the most amazing, strongest woman I have ever met. Have you ever met a woman who just glows from amazingness and positiveness? If you haven't, you really should meet her.
So I love the days where I have a billion deliveries, and I'm jammin out to Fly Like A G6 (1- that song is so damn catchy and 2- are they talking about Pontiac G6 or is there a plane called a G6? We had this argument at work today)... and anyway so I'm jammin and I think I'm making good money. Then I count my tips and I don't even make enough to put the gas into my car that got me to those deliveries. SO F*** YOU POTHEADS WHO STIFFED ME TODAY! NAG CHAMPA DOESN'T COVER ANYTHING UP I CAN STILL SMELL IT DOUCHE BAG!
But I did deliver to the coolest guys ever today. I knock on the door and they invite me in. They have absolutely no furniture in the whole house... they literally only have 3 computers playing Left 4 Dead 2. How freaking awesome is that? They sit around and kill zombies all freakin day. "Screw ESPN I have an axe and a crowbar!" (Video game nerds just live in the world of kickass. If you're wondering, my version of kickass also includes hiphop dancers and ethnomethodologists.) Anyway, the coolest thing about these guys is that they are probably gonna be the next dude who made facebook guy. Or the next Bill Gates if you didn't understand that last reference. (Famous people should never have names like Zikkerablyeburg or whatever Facebook Man's name is).
I wish I could sit on my ass and play video games all day. If you don't like Halo or Call of Duty, you just really have no enjoyment in life.

So I saw this study awhile ago. The results were literally groundbreaking enough to be put on MSN and the evening news. (I really want to see something shocking enough to ACTUALLY break the ground... hmm new thing on my bucket list). But anyway, so here it is: PEOPLE WITH A LOT OF FRIENDS GET SICK MORE OFTEN. What? That was what I clicked on the link and waited 5.8 seconds for it to load for? And then to make it even worse, they felt the need to explain it to people in a 68 line article! This one is almost as good as "The more fast food you eat, the more weight you gain" study. (And on a side note... I hate the fat people who sue McDonald's. If people can sue for that, I want to sue the real estate company for putting a house in the way of my car.)
I want to know who gets paid to figure that out. I really think there's just some big fat guy with a cigar and a manwig (toupee? I think) who thinks of the most obvious thing ever and writes it down as a "study."

So, I'm off to play beer pong. Which is really just me being drunk chucking a ball and running around talking to everyone while Kyle makes all the shots. And I still take the credit and say I kick ass at that game... which I do.

P.S. Random question... In the movie Surrogates, Bruce Willis's wife is a hair dresser. But since they are all robots and can look however they want, why do they need to get their hair cut? Their hair doesn't grow first of all, and secondly wouldn't the robot fixers change the hair instead of having a hairstylist?

P.P.S. Did you know that karaoke in japanese means "empty orchestra?" Weird how that works out.